


Don't Text at One A.M. Spacetime

by Blue_eyed_Crow



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: F/F, F/M, Implied Character Injury, Kuron is evil, M/M, Meme, Memes, Season 6ish, chatfic, honestly just so many memes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-26 11:24:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17140877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blue_eyed_Crow/pseuds/Blue_eyed_Crow
Summary: Space is lonely. But it isn't as lonely when you have 5 giant robot lions and a group chat full of memes and parental locks. Fun times.





	Don't Text at One A.M. Spacetime

_Allura.Blue has invited Shiro.Black, Pidge.Green, Lance.Red, Hunk.Yellow to the group ‘Legendary Defenders’_

 

_Allura.Blue (00:30)- Hello everyone! I decided to create my own group chat per Lance’s request so that we may have many fun talks together!_

 

Pidge.Green (00:31)- What the  frick Lance?

Pidge.Green (00:31)- *  frick

Pidge.Green (00:32)- **  frick

Pidge.Green (00:35)- I give up

 

_Lance.Red (06:12)- ha what the frick_

 

Pidge.Green (06:12)- I will murder you

 

_Lance.Red (06:13)- touchy_

_Lance.Red has changed nickname to RazzleDazzle420_

 

Pidge.Green (06:14)- Allura ban this child

Pidge.Green has changed nickname to Pidge

 

_Allura.Blue (06:16)- I am unsure how to do that Pidge_

 

Shiro.Black (06:30)- Pidge did you go to bed last night?

 

_RazzleDazzle420 (06:35)- Oooh Pidge’s in trouble_

 

Pidge (06:35)- Shut your quiznak Lance

Pidge (06:37)- At least my name’s not a  w**d reference

Pidge (06:40)- THe  heck ???

 

_RazzleDazzle420’s name has been changed to RazzleDazzle_

_RazzleDazzle (06:41)- Did you just censor  w**d ?_

_RazzleDazzle (06:42)- WHY DID YOU CHANGE MY NAME???_

_RazzleDazzle (06:43)- WHY DID IT CENSOR W**D ??!_

 

Pidge (06:45)- Lol it is funny

 

_RazzleDazzle (06:45)- Shut up Pidge_

 

Shiro.Black (06:46)- No fighting in the group chat

 

_RazzleDazzle (06:46)- Yes Dad_

 

Pidge (06:47)- lol

 

Shiro.Black has left the group chat

 

_Allura.Blue (06:56)- This may be my fault. It appears parental lock is on and I’m unable to change it._

_Allura.Blue has added Shiro.Black to the group chat ‘Legendary Defenders’_

Pidge (06:57)- Frick

 

_RazzleDazzle (06:58)- lanGUAGE_

 

Pidge (06:58)- english

Pidge (06:59)- thought you knew that

 

Shiro.Black has left the group chat.

_Allura.Blue has added Shiro.Black to the group chat ‘Legendary Defenders’_

 

_RazzleDazzle has changed the Group Name to ‘Sup beaches’_

_RazzleDazzle has invited **Coran.Coran.Gorg.Man** to the group chat ‘Sup beaches’ _

 

_Allura.Blue has changed the Group Name to ‘Voltron Crew’_

_Allura.Blue (07:32)- Hello Coran :)))_

 

Pidge (07:33)- who the  frick taught you that??

 

**_Coran.Coran.Gorg.Man (07:34)- Greetings Allura. Greetings number 5! Lance my boy is this the group chat you were talking about?_ **

 

_Allura.Blue (07:34)- Is that not correct? Lance told me it was a ‘smiley face’._

 

Pidge (07:35)-   -_-

 

_Allura.Blue (07:35)- Is that the correct “emoji”?_

Pidge (07:36)- Quiznak you Lance

 

_RazzleDazzle (08:00)- WHAT DID I DO???_

_RazzleDazzle (08:01)- Corn how are you? :DDDD_

_RazzleDazzle (08:03)- Don’t listen to the Gremlin Allura you did great_

_RazzleDazzle (08:05)- *Coran_

 

**_Coran.Coran.Gorg.Man changed nickname to Corn_ **

**_Corn (08:07)- I’m well my boy. :DDDD_ **

**_Corn (08:08)- Is that how you use emoji?_ **

 

Pidge (08:09)- Corn not you too

Pidge (08:10)- although Lance…

Pidge changed nickname to Gremlin

 

**Hunk.Yellow (08:11)- Oh a group chat**

**Hunk.Yellow changed nickname to Hunk**

 

_RazzleDazzle (08:11)- :((((_

 

**Hunk changed nickname to Hunkalicious**

 

_RazzleDazzle (08:13)- :)))))_

 

**Hunkalicious (08:14)- :))))**

**Hunkalicious (08:14)- Oh we’re missing someone**

**Hunkalicious added Keith.Blade to the Group Chat to ‘Voltron Crew’**

 

Gremlin changed Group Name to ‘Sexual Tension’

 

_Allura.Blue changed Group Name to ‘No Pidge’_

**Keith.Blade (08:45)- What the  frick ?**

 

_RazzleDazzle (08:46)- Keef_

 

Gremlin (08:46)- Keef

 

**Hunkalicious (08:47)- Keef**

 

_RazzleDazzle (08:47)- Hahaha Hunk you lose_

 

**Hunkalicious (08:48)- Dang it**

**Keith.Blade has left the group chat**

Shiro.Black has added Keith.Blade to the Group Chat ‘No Pidge’

Shiro (08:50)- If :) I :) have :) to :) suffer :) so :) do :) you :)

**Keith.Blade (08:51)-.... Is everything alright with Shiro?**

_RazzleDazzle (08:52)- Not since he was born_

 

Gremlin (08:53)- Oooh burn

 

_Allura.Blue (08:54)- Pidge are you alright? Do you need a healing pod?_

 

Gremlin (08:55)- Yeah. Just an expression Allura

Gremlin (08:57)- Really?! You sent Coran to check up on me?

 

_Allura.Blue (08:58)- I was worried._

_Allura.Blue (08:59)- Oh Shiro I have something important, please meet me in the control room_

_RazzleDazzle (08:59)- ‘,:)_

 

**Hunkalicious (09:00)-  ‘,:)**

 

Gremlin (09:00)- ‘,:)

 

Shiro.Black (09:01)- One more face and y’all will run laps in training

**Keith.Blade (09:09)- ‘,:)**

 

Shiro.Black (09:10)- Today in training we’re running laps

 

_RazzleDazzle (09:14)- >:( _

_RazzleDazzle (09:14)- *white girl voice* He doesn’t even go here_

 

Shiro.Black (09:15)- Lance you’re running 5 more laps

 

<< _Lance.Red_ is directly chatting with **Keith.Blade** >>

 

_Lance.Red (09:15)- I hate you_

 

_Lance.Red exited the chat_

 

<< **Keith.Blade** is directly chatting with Shiro.Black>>

**Keith.Blade (09:18)- Thanks a lot Shiro**

Shiro.Black (09:39)- ????

**Keith.Blade (09:40)- You punishing Lance**

**Keith.Blade (09:41)- He sent me this**

**Keith.Blade sent an image**

 

Shiro.Black (09:43)- I’m sorry Keith I’ll correct the situation.

Shiro.Black exited the chat

**Keith.Blade exited the chat**

 

<< _Lance.Red_ is directly chatting with **Keith.Blade** >>

 

_Lance.Red (11:51)- You  fricking snitch!_

 

**Keith.Blade (12:24)- What?**

 

_Lance.Red (12:24)- You know what you did!_

_Lance.Red (12:25)- I got the standard “bullying is wrong” lecture from mc  fricking Shiro, and had to run TWICE as much as the others_

_Lance.Red (12:26)- How do I turn off the  frickin parental lock_

_Lance.Red exited the chat_

 

Gremlin (13:36)- Hey has anyone heard from Lance? I haven’t seen him since we finished training

 

Shiro.Black (13:40)- He stayed behind to finish up some extra training

 

**Hunkalicious (13:42)- For Three Hours??**

 

**_Corn (13:45)- I do believe Lance is with Red._ **

 

Gremlin (13:47)- Thanks Coran

Gremlin (14:12)- THE JERK WON’T LET ME IN!!

 

Shiro.Black (14:15)- I’ll talk to Lance, Pidge.

 

<< **Hunk.Yellow** is directly chatting with **Keith.Blade** >>

 

**Hunk.Yellow (13:49)- I’m worried about Lance dude. He didn’t even come into the kitchen since training**

**Hunk.Yellow (13:52)- Unless I didn’t see him**

**Hunk.Yellow (13:53)- But I don’t think that’s the case.**

 

**Keith.Blade (13:54)- I used to skip lunch all the time.**

**Hunk.Yellow (13:56)-That’s...bad Keith.**

**Hunk.Yellow (13:58)- But he also skipped breakfast this morning despite being up at /6/**

**Hunk.Yellow (13:59)- And I saw him in the kitchen at 3 two nights ago?**

**Hunk.Yellow (14:01)- Has he talked to you lately?**

 

**Keith.Blade (14:04)- No. Why would he talk to me? He doesn’t even like me. He made that abundantly clear.**

 

**Hunk.Yellow (14:06)- Keith...he cares about you and your opinion more than anyone.**

**Hunk.Yellow (14:06)- I don’t know what he told you, but I /KNOW/ for a fact he does care about you.**

 

**Keith.Blade (14:10)- Oh.**

 

**Hunk.Yellow (14:16)- Please talk to Lance before Shiro gets there.**

 

<< **Keith.Blade** is directly chatting with _Lance.Red_ >>

 

**Keith.Blade (14:17)- Hey Lance.**

**Keith.Blade (14:17)- I’m sorry for making you run extra laps**

**Keith.Blade (14:18)- I just wanted to joke with you and didn’t want you to get punished**

 

_Lance.Red (14:18)- Well you did._

 

**Keith.Blade (14:18)- I know and I’m sorry.**

 

_Lance.Red (14:19)- Thank you Keith._

_Lance.Red (14:20)- I’m sorry that I said I hated you. I really don’t_

**Keith.Blade (14:21)- Yeah that was really immature**

**Keith.Blade (14:22)- :b**

**Keith.Blade (14:32)- That was a joke**

**Keith.Blade (14:37)- Lance?**

 

_Lance.Red (14:41)- Sorry. Shiro._

 

**Keith.Blade (14:43)- There’s a cubby in the training room that you can hide in.**

 

_Lance.Red (14:43)- Oh?_

 

**Keith.Blade (14:45)- It’s near the control panel. No one can enter if you don’t want them too- but most don’t know of it. I hid in it all the time.**

_Lance.Red (14:47)- ...thank you Keith._

_Lance.Red (14:48)- Be safe on your upcoming mission okay? You might be the edgy reckless samurai but you’re our samurai._

_Lance.Red (14:50)- If you get hurt I will kill you_

 

**Keith.Blade (14:55)- K**

 

_Lance exited the chat_

 

Gremlin (14:30)- What the  heck is everyone?

 

**Hunkalicious (14:35)- Relaxing in the lounge with some purpley cocoa**

 

Gremlin (14:35)- Omw and there better be cocoa for me

 

**Hunkalicious (14:36)- Well there might be enough for you-depends on when Lance comes to get his cocoa**

**Hunkalicious (15:02)- Lance where are you?**

 

Gremlin (15:20)- Dude I might have saved a cup for you but it’s looking pretty tempting.

Gremlin (15:20)- If you don’t answer within five minutes I’m drinking it

Gremlin sent an image

Gremlin (15:26)- Say goodbye to your cocoa

Gremlin sent an image

Gremlin sent an image

 

Shiro.Black (15.45)- Paladins report to the control room for a debriefing

Shiro.Black (15:55)- Lance that means you too

 

_RazzleDazzle (16:04)-  frick shiro I was sleeping_

_RazzleDazzle (16:06)- Gremlin you  fricking beach_

_RazzleDazzle (16:07)- I’m coming I’m coming sheesh. Stop blasting Matt singing All-Star. He can’t sing._

 

Gremlin (16:09)- ;p

Gremlin added ~~Mattholdit~~ to the group chat ‘No Pidge’

 

~~Mattholdit (16:09)- Scuz you beach but I am an amazing singer~~

~~Mattholdit left the group chat~~

 

_RazzleDazzle (16:11)- How??? I read it and now I can't????_

 

Shiro.Black (16:12)- We are literally having a meeting right now Lance.

 

_RazzleDazzle (16:13)- You’re on your phone too tho?_

_RazzleDazzle (16:15)- Ugh Shiro_

 

Gremlin (17:23)- sucka ****

Gremlin (17:23)- parental lock sucks

 

**Hunkalicious (17:25)- It amuses me**

 

Gremlin (17:26)- W o w

Gremlin  (17:26)- That was surprisingly malicious

 

_RazzleDazzle (17:29)- Don’t be fooled Pidgey- Hunk may look sweet and cuddly on the outside but he’s a sadistic bear on the inside_

 

Gremlin (17:29)- kinky

Gremlin (17:30)- didnt know you were into that

 

_RazzleDazzle (17:35)- I don’t_

_RazzleDazzle (17:36)- what you mean????_

 

**Hunkalicious (17:36)- I don’t what you mean**

 

Gremlin (17:36)- I don’t what you mean

Gremlin (17:37)-  dang it

 

**Keith.Blade (17:37)-  frick you guys I almost got  fricking chewed out by fricking  Kolivan**

**Keith.Blade (17:38)- Allura turn off the  fricking parental lock**

 

_Allura.Blue (17:41)- I’m sorry! I’m unable to do so. I’m not old enough. :(_

 

_RazzleDazzle (17:42)- aren’t you like_

_RazzleDazzle (17:43)- a thousand years old?_

 

_Allura.Blue (17:44)- Cryo-stasis doesn’t add to your age apparently._

_Allura.Blue (17:42)- 10,000 actually._

 

_RazzleDazzle (17:46)- Dang_

_RazzleDazzle changed Allura.Blue’s name to Older.Than.Yo.Grandma_

 

Gremlin changed Older.Than.Yo.Grandma’s name to 10000yrs.Beach

 

_10000yrs.Beach (17:51)- very funny paladins. Change it back._

 

**Hunkalicious (17:52)- you know**

**Hunkalicious (17:53)- it kinda fits**

 

_RazzleDazzle (17:55)- Hunk, my man, my boo, my side heo, you are terrible at naming things_

 

Gremlin (17:55)- heo

 

**Hunkalicious (17:57)- Like you’re any better you meme noodle**

 

_RazzleDazzle (17:58)- So I’m funny and delicious ;p_

 

**Hunkalicious (18:00)- Straight until you get wet**

 

Gremlin (18:00)- ooh burn!

 

_RazzleDazzle (18:02)- Fight me sunshine boy_

 

Gremlin (18:03)- Fight! Fight! Fight!

 

Shiro.Black (18:05)- No fighting or I’ll make you run laps to burn off that extra energy.

**Keith.Blades (18:06)- Fight! Fight! Fight!**

 

Shiro.Black (18:15)- Lance.

 

<< _Lance.Red_ is directly chatting with **Keith.Blades** >>

_Lance.Red (18:16)- Keith_

 

**Keith.Blades (18:18)- Yes?**

 

_Lance.Red (18:18)- I’m hiding in the bathroom from shirt_

_Lance.Red (18:19)- *shiro_

 

**Keith.Blades (18:19)- Okay?**

 

_Lance.Red (18:20)- Is there like a secert pasaggew;sagf_

 

**Keith.Blades (18:21)- Lance?**

**Keith.Blades (18:23)- Lance pls respond**

**Keith.Blades (18:24)- LANCE**

**Keith.Blades exited the chat**

 

**Keith.Blades (18:25)- Guys what happened?**

**Keith.Blades (18:31)- GUYS**

 

<<Pidge.Green is directly chatting with **Keith.Blades** >>

Pidge.Green (18:42)- Thank you

Pidge.Green (18:42)- if you tell anyone I said that I’ll kill you

Pidge.Green left the chat

 

<< **Hunk.Yellow** is directly chatting with **Keith.Blades** >>

**Hunk.Yellow (18:42)- Thank you dude. You’re a literal angel.**

**Hunk.Yellow left the chat**

 

<< **Keith.Blades** is directly chatting with _Lance. Red_ >>

**Keith.Blade (18:41)- Are you alright?**

 

_Lance.Red (18:45)- yeah_

 

**Keith.Blades (18:45)- I’m sorry.**

**Keith.Blades (18:46)- You should get some ice**

_Lance.Red (18:47)- Not your fault_

_Lance.Red (18:48)- I’m just going to lay down_

 

** Keith.Blades (18:53)- Lance you really need to ice it **

**Keith.Blades (18:55)- It’ll swell and none of the ladies will fall for your pickup lines**

 

_Lance.Red (18:57)- right_

_Lance.Red (18:57)- the ladies_

_Lance.Red (18:58)- If I ice it will you do something?_

 

**Keith.Blades (18:59)- Nothing illegal**

**Keith.Blades (19:00)- I want proof**

 

_Lance.Red sent an image_

_Lance.Red (19:07)- do this_

_Lance.Red sent an image_

_Lance.Red sent an image_

 

**Keith.Blades left the chat**

 

**Hunkalicious (19:07)- Obviously waffles are the superior breakfast food and anyone who says otherwise can. Fight. Me.**

 

**Keith.Blades changed their name to FurryFriend**

**FurryFriend (19:15)-....**

**FurryFriend (19:15)-...**

**FurryFriend (19:17)- hewwo Owo**

**FurryFriend (19:19)- Mr. Obama hewwo**

 

Gremlin (19:22)- Keith what the  frick

 

**FurryFriend (19:23)- I’m in twubble please mr obama**

 

Gremlin (19:24)-  frick you made me laugh so hard goo came out my nose

 

**Hunkalicious sent a photo**

**Hunkalicious (19:25)- wait**

**Hunkalicious (19:25)- I know this**

 

**FurryFriend (19:26)- I’ll do anything**

 

_RazzleDazzle (19:27)- Anything?_

 

**Hunkalicious (19:27)- Owo**

 

**FurryFriend (19:27)- anything for you mr. obama**

**FurryFriend (19:29)-....**

**FurryFriend (19:29)- <3**

_RazzleDazzle (19:30)- Then Perish_

 

**Hunkalicious (19:31)- Yep called it**

**Hunklalicious (19:32)- lmao savage**

 

_10000yrs.Beach (19:31)- Oh my. Keith are you alright?_

 

**FurryFriend (19:32)- Only my pride is wounded**

 

**Hunkalicious (19:32)- I can’t believe Pidge convinced to do that**

 

Gremlin (19:33)- This time it wasn’t me

Gremlin (19:34)- Hunk you will pay for that photo

 

**Hunkalicious (19:35)- Well if I’m dying anyway**

**Hunkalicious sent a photo**

**Hunkalicious sent a photo**

**Hunkalicious sent a photo**

 

**_Corn (19:36)- Marvelous shot number two! I daresay you make an excellent photographer!_ **

 

_RazzleDazzle (19:36)- Whoa I actually forgot you were here_

_RazzleDazzle (19:37)- Have you just been watching_

 

**_Corn (19:37)- yes_ **

**_Corn (19:37)- It’s not creepy at all my boy_ **

 

_RazzleDazzle (19:37)- That’s creepy_

_RazzleDazzle (19:37)- !!!!!!!!_

_RazzleDazzle (19:38)- setting that creepy exchange aside someone should check on Hunk I hear dying noises_

_RazzleDazzle sent a video_

_RazzleDazzle (19:39)- Ohmygod Pidge fights  fricking dirty_

_RazzleDazzle sent a video_

 

Shiro.Black (19:40)- Stop them Lance before they get hurt. 

 

**FurryFriend changed Shiro.Black’s name to GrumpyGills**

**FurryFriend (19:40)- If I have to suffer so do you**

 

_10000yrs.Beach (20:01)- Please someone get Lance. I can’t reach him and he’s not in red yet_

 

**Hunkalicious (20:01)- omw**


End file.
